Written by Angela Caban,

Throughout the six years that my husband and I have been married, I have grown to love and understand his relationship with his mistress. She has been around for 13 years and is his main priority. She calls whenever she wants, takes over his life, and steals him away from his family at the very moment we need him the most. My husband misses birthdays, holidays and special events due to his mistress. Most women would be bothered by this, but military spouses all over face this same problem.

The United States Army is not only his mistress but also a way of life that we have all come to understand and love. And we have to joke about this, if not we would probably scream and go crazy. It’s crazy that I would love something so much that is constantly pulling us away but our lives thrive on the suspense of never knowing what will come next. We see it as an adventure that is constantly keeping us on our toes.

So what has my life been like you may ask? The best way to describe the military life we have lived is a very windy roller coaster ride. There have been many unexpected twists and turns and in the end a halt but always the knowing that it will take off at any point.

Frequent Separation: Whether he is away at Annual Training (AT), in which they are gone for two weeks out of the year, 3 days a month for drill, his recent 8 month deployment or he is on a 3-6 month ADSW assignment, separation for us has been frequent throughout the past 6 years. It is always something that is expected regardless of his status.

Problems Communicating: In the time that my husband was away there were many times we could not communicate with each other. The longest time we spent without communication was 3 weeks and it was tough. Although frustrating, it is part of the separation process.

Long Work Hours: Too much work and no overtime. Yup that’s the military for you. There are times he works for 18 hours straight with no break other than the 10 minutes they give him to shovel down an MRE. It definitely is not like any other civilian job.

People ask if I am okay with the fact that the military comes first. I simply say that his duty and obligation is not only to his country, but to his family. He keeps us safe by sacrificing his own life and that to me is precious. I could not be more proud of him and I know what he does is not only because he loves it, but because his family is important and comes first. That to me is worth all the struggle and sacrifice we have been through.

For more on Angela Caban, visit her website at www.angelacaban.com.

Join me and other military spouses on my Facebook, Twitter or MySpace fan page.